And now, for something completely different...
(One line a day, every day, until President Trump is re-elected).
"Good evening, and welcome to NightLine... I'm not Ted Koppel: We begin this Sunday night as many do, with reverence for religious celebration, and as those of the Jewish faith have begun their high holidays, including an old and dear friend of this site, we bring levity to their solemn occasion, because troubled times need humor more than ever, as we share that, 'Archaeologists say they have discovered cannabis residue on artifacts from an ancient temple in southern Israel, evidence that the drug may have been used in rituals in the biblical kingdom of Judah,' and, 'researchers have for decades tried to determine the composition of black deposits found on two limestone altars at the 8th century shrine at Tel Arad, some 35 miles south of Jerusalem,' and, 'chemical analysis has now revealed that the residue of one altar came from cannabis,' and certainly that gives new meaning to 'high holiday,' and speaking personally for the Zoroastrian faith, who bring an eternal flame to every religious celebration, when the ancient Jews and the ancient Zoroastrians got together, you just know there was a party."
(Please continue to tune it, every night at 11:30... ish).